It’s one of those questions that sits on the edge of curiosity and controversy: who leads in workplace romance? Who cheats more—and why does it seem like certain professions get more fingers pointed at them than others?
Across society, suspicions run high when it comes to jobs that supposedly encourage extra-marital affairs. From whispers at family gatherings to late-night gossip among friends, everyone seems to have an opinion. These opinions, often laced with both truth and prejudice, stem from a mix of societal observation, cultural beliefs, stereotypes, and the simple human instinct to protect what we love.
It’s fascinating how our collective view of certain professions shapes how we judge people who work in them. Some careers are praised as safe havens for marital fidelity, while others are almost automatically deemed red zones — career paths many wouldn’t want their partners to tread. The suspicion is subtle sometimes, and other times, it’s loud and unforgiving. Parents discourage daughters from marrying entertainers. Men joke nervously about their wives becoming nurses or media personalities. And somewhere deep in these reactions lies a fear: the fear of betrayal in a world that seems to spin faster every day.
This public perception doesn’t just influence gossip—it shapes real decisions. It makes parents reject suitors. It causes lovers to question innocent friendships. It makes whole professions victims of moral judgment. Yet, despite being one of the most thought-provoking topics—one that dominates private conversations between friends, classmates, or lovers—it’s rarely discussed openly in formal settings, media panels, or intellectual discourse.
Until now.
A psychologist recently took on the daring task of cracking this very puzzle—not through gossip or generalized assumptions—but through rigorous scientific inquiry. Their research aimed to uncover the patterns of infidelity with a focus on workplace dynamics, and the results were enough to jolt anyone into reflection.
One headline from this study caught my attention:
“Healthcare professionals might create stressful conditions that can fuel infidelity. Does this mean no medical worker can be trusted in love?”
At first glance, the suggestion felt bold—maybe even offensive. But curiosity demanded a deeper look.
In 2018, the controversial dating platform Ashley Madison surveyed over 1,000 of its users—people already seeking affairs—and discovered that 23% of female users worked in medicine. Doctors and nurses topped the list. A few years later, the UK-based Illicit Encounters echoed similar findings, reporting that nurses formed the largest group of female users on their platform.
The explanation? A cocktail of long hours, emotional stress, and just enough opportunity to make temptation easier to act on. Isabella Mise, spokesperson for Ashley Madison, noted that burnout and stress might nudge medical professionals into affairs, not because they are less moral, but because they are more overwhelmed.
Still, that data led to a cascade of questions: Does a profession create cheaters, or just offer the conditions where existing cracks are more likely to widen?
Digging deeper, a 2021 study published in the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health found that 21% of doctors and nurses surveyed admitted to being unfaithful at some point. Yet contrary to the stereotype of the unfaithful nurse, the majority of cheaters in that sample were men—doctors, to be precise. Men were almost five times more likely to cheat than their female counterparts. Night shifts, stress, and time away from home all played a role.
But here’s the catch: correlation isn’t causation. Just because someone works in a demanding profession doesn’t mean they’ll cheat. The choice to betray a partner remains deeply personal, rooted more in the internal than the external.
Infidelity is often less about opportunity and more about what’s happening inside a person. Unhappiness in one’s relationship, low self-esteem, unresolved trauma, or even dark personality traits like narcissism play significant roles. Studies have shown that cheaters often aren’t looking for love—they’re running from something: boredom, dissatisfaction, or the terrifying mirror of their own flaws.
Still, one can’t help but question why professions like nursing, more visible and accessible in society, get disproportionately dragged into this conversation. Is it because we see them more? Is it because they’re trusted with life, and therefore betrayal feels deeper?
Critics of the study argue that it left out numerous high-risk professions that arguably invite even more suspicion. What about soldiers and police officers, whose duties often keep them away from home for long periods? What of actors, musicians, and entertainers who constantly face public scrutiny, romantic rumours, and fan worship? Just recently, Nollywood actor RMD caused a stir by admitting it’s tough to stay loyal with the number of women throwing themselves at him daily.
And what of lecturers—often accused of “sex for grades”—or bankers, who spend more waking hours with colleagues than with their spouses? Chefs, waiters, and hotel staff? Even clergy, some of whom have used their spiritual authority for romantic manipulation?
Or politicians?
Politics might be the most morally perilous profession of them all. With power comes temptation—and the resources to hide it. The long-standing suspicion that women in politics are morally compromised isn’t just cruel—it’s a reflection of how deep public contempt runs. Recent allegations of sexual misconduct in high places have only added fuel to this perception.
And what about sportsmen, who are seen as physical gods, with fame, travel, and temptation at every corner? Or media personalities whose public image makes them constant targets of admiration and attention?
Strikingly, many of these professions—despite having equal or higher suspicion levels—were conveniently left out of the psychologist’s research. Why? That, in itself, invites interrogation.
Ultimately, infidelity is a tangled web. It’s not just about gender. It’s not just about the job. It’s about personal values, emotional intelligence, self-control, communication, and context. Yes, certain jobs might present more opportunities, but opportunity doesn’t automatically equal action.
The truth is, no profession is immune. Cheating happens in clinics and classrooms, in churches and boardrooms, in hotel kitchens and luxury buses. No one can predict fidelity based on a LinkedIn profile.
Instead of obsessing over what our partners do, maybe it’s time we start paying attention to who they are—and whether they’ve done the internal work to build something real, honest, and respectful.
Workplace romance is not a crime. Neither is attraction. But loyalty? That’s a conscious, continuous choice. One that has little to do with the job title on a name badge—and everything to do with the values written on the heart.
Muhammad can be reached at bagudum75@gmail.com and 07034943575
